So this showed up on my Facebook feed the other day, and the feels, they are REAL.
Not only is there an adorable drawing of a kitty cat, but it rather succinctly sums up a part of my personality that has always driven me crazy. I am quite possibly the worst person when it comes to keeping in touch, keeping tabs, keeping up appearances. It’s a handicap that could prove fatal in the world of independent publishing, too, because there’s so much emphasis on putting yourself out there, following up, so on and so forth. Does this mean I’m doomed to failure? Hopefully not. I’m getting better, though it comes in valleys and peaks…One strong week of getting out there and cavorting with my fellow writers and readers, followed by the long stretches of retreating to my own little bubble.
But I’m an outgoing brand of introvert, meaning that I really do love talking to people and engaging, but I often get overwhelmed by the interactions, and that stress drives me deeper into the mode of isolation. And I put thing off because I can’t “deal with it” at that moment, and then I feel bad for ignoring someone or something, and I feel so bad about it that I’d rather avoid dealing with it all together. So somethings fall by the wayside, and I can’t even talk to the person because I feel so bad for being the flightiest person in the world.
Definitely a conundrum. And definitely a good reason why I have to invest in an agent eventually, probably. But for now, I’m just going to tut along as best I can, try to be better, and just keep forging forward, even if I’m doing it in the complete opposite direction of effective, feeling incredible comfort in the fact that there’s at least one other person out there who understands what it feels like.